I was looking for a romantic testimonial for Valentine’s Day. Finally, I was offered a story of love and solidarity. It is that of Charles Bujold, a 68-year-old man…
Posted yesterday at 12:00 p.m.
“Why do you want to share your story? »
The man took a moment to think. Then, in one breath, he said to me, “So people know there’s hope when you get old while being gay.” The truth is that getting old didn’t excite me at all! Then, suddenly, my life took a different turn. »
Charles Bujold grew up in Gaspésie. There, he did not dare to live his homosexuality, as “it was less well seen, let’s say”. In 1972, he settled in Montreal, promising never to hide again.
Since then, Charles appears as he is.
When the time came to move into a seniors’ residence, the man looked for a place where he wouldn’t have to hide his orientation. In 2014, he became one of the very first tenants of Habitat Fullum, an apartment complex where inclusion is paramount.
The residence, located in a former convent near the Gay Village of Montreal, came to meet a crying need in the LGBTQ+ community: to offer a living environment free from homophobia. An establishment where people of all sexual orientations would coexist and where each resident would be perfectly at ease with love, regardless of its variations.
“I applied because we promised a culture of openness, but I wondered how that would be reflected, concretely…”, recalls Charles Bujold.
Eight years later, he finds that this culture is simply embodied in the community formed by the residents: “We eat, we garden and we celebrate together. Then, I’m never embarrassed to arrive here with my spouse, as many people are gay and others accept it… Otherwise, they would be unhappy! »
Spouse, let’s talk about it.
Charles met him online. They corresponded for five years before seeing each other for the very first time…
“We’ve been a couple for three and a half years now… It was a long preparation! “, he sums up, laughing.
The man – who is now a Canadian citizen – was in the process of immigrating to the country. He was chatting with Charles to learn more about Quebec. Between them, no promise or even intention to meet. What a friendship.
Charles was still “very, very nervous” when he finally welcomed his friend at the airport, after five years of ad hoc exchanges…
“I can still see him jumping in place, shouting my name. I liked it straight away. He is a charming, intelligent, pleasant character… A silk! »
While Charles Bujold was depressed at the thought of celebrating his 65and birthday, a month later, love struck. Lightness assailed him, against all odds. Since then, happiness has been lived slowly.
The couple have never lived together and do not intend to do so. He takes each day as it comes, blessing the chance that has united him.
“It’s a great adventure that can end tomorrow, believes Charles. I’ve had relationships like “he goes to the convenience store and never comes back”. Not to mention aging, which leads to the disappearance of the people we love. A friend lost his partner last week… I realize that you have to take advantage of the present moment because you never know what can happen. »
My interlocutor interrupts for a moment. He sighs. He thinks a lot about his bereaved friend these days. I’m trying a diversion…
“And how was your lover’s first visit to Habitat Fullum?” »
Charles lights up again.
“It was during a New Year’s Day dinner! People were happy for me, as I am happy for them when I learn that they have someone in their life who makes them happy…”
In the aftermath, the man recognizes his luck. He admits that many seniors do not have the freedom to experience their love in front of their peers. Rare are the residences where inclusion is so openly a priority…
“I sympathize with the elders who have to remain discreet because we grew up in a time when it was more difficult to be gay. There are some who have been married to women and who have had a parallel life, for example… With all the drama that implies! Society was hard on homosexuals 50 years ago. So I think there are more homophobes in the aging population. »
This homophobia, Charles Bujold no longer wants it.
In fact, if it wasn’t for a pro-LGBTQ+ place, Charles would have fled seniors’ residences. He would have stayed in an apartment for as long as possible, even if it means depriving himself of the care that is increasingly necessary with age.
I could not have had neighbors who judge me when I arrive with my spouse. We get rid of a lot of things as we get older, but there are places we don’t want to go back to…
Charles Bujold
“I knew it wouldn’t be like that here. If only one person dared to judge us, they would be picked up. We are in the majority, so we would take our revenge! »
Charles bursts out laughing at the thought of his band of friends and handing him a homophobe in his place…
“I say it in joke, but deep down, it’s true. It’s over, getting finger pointing. »
A story of love and solidarity, as I told you.