“We understand that Mother’s Day is a sensitive time for some. We would like to give you the opportunity to avoid receiving emails about this. »
Posted yesterday at 9:00 a.m.
My lover handed me his phone. “Have you seen this before? »
No, I had never seen a company (Vinyl Me, Please, to be precise) invite its customers to unsubscribe from newsletters relating to Mother’s Day. I replied that it was a great idea and that the bereaved deserved this peace of mind. Then, I wondered how they manage to reclaim a birthday that advertisers take over every May…
The poet Marjolaine Beauchamp is about to experience a first Mother’s Day without hers. She admits to being terrified.
“You go back to everyday life, people get up, argue, take their car, the ads talk about Mother’s Day, life goes on… But you just want to shout: ‘ My mother just died, stop breathing!” »
Over time, the pain becomes less severe. However, it remains impossible to escape the birthday, believes the actress Léane Labrèche-Dor, who was 16 when her mother died. “It’s exaggerated, any reason is good to sell us something! »
PHOTO MARCO CAMPANOZZI, PRESS ARCHIVES
Julie Artacho
“The years when I’m less well, it makes me angry to receive promotional emails, Julie Artacho explains to me… No, I’m not going to buy new clothes to have brunch with my mother. Leave me alone with this! »
The photographer lost her mother 23 years ago. According to her, companies would have everything to gain by imitating the initiative of Vinyl Me, Please. “I find it respectful and honest; we’re going to come back to sell us business, but we’re going to have a little decency for two weeks! »
Entrepreneurs, take notes.
Now, if it is completely healthy to unsubscribe from newsletters relating to a party that hurts us, it is not necessarily recommended to cut yourself off from any promotional campaign, according to Nathalie Parent.
The psychologist, author and lecturer has worked extensively on bereavement. She believes that the more one avoids a feeling, the stronger it eventually comes back.
Ads can confront us with our mother’s absence and stir up certain emotions, it’s true. But when the context lends itself to it, why not take a moment to get closer to the said emotion?
“Advertising or not, the lack is there anyway,” says Nathalie Parent. Mother’s Day can be an opportunity to live this lack. To get out of mourning, you have to enter into it, said Guy Corneau. »
PHOTO PROVIDED BY MARJOLAINE BEAUCHAMP
Marjolaine Beauchamp (right) with her sister Isabelle and her mother, Roxane
This is what Marjolaine Beauchamp intends to do: “I know that this day will be marked by a ritual. Because a ritual serves to give meaning. »
The artist does not know the exact nature of the activity for which she will opt, but she will have defined it with the complicity of her daughter.
“My mother now needs us to exist,” she adds. She was a tough eccentric to follow. She was grand and generous. How do you pay homage to a woman like that? Fortunately, she left me this ability to take things, break them and reshape them in my own way. It’s a nice gift. »
Remodeling Mother’s Day is precisely the right that Julie Artacho grants herself.
“It’s a day where I now give myself space to live what I want. I allow myself not to work, for example. I try to see my friends and do something with someone that makes me feel good. I live with the emotions that come up and I’ve learned not to feel guilty if I’m not sad! We sometimes have the impression of being a bad bereaved, but it could be a Sunday like any other…”
For Léane Labrèche-Dor, it’s even a pretty happy Sunday.
“Over the years, my family and I have learned to celebrate gently. We send each other messages, for example. For my part, I say a few words to my mother, when I get up… I don’t often speak to her out loud, but I do that day. And I have a grandmother to whom I can still wish a happy Mother’s Day! »
In fact, the actress quickly got into the habit of wishing a happy Mother’s Day to all the mother figures important to her. Her grandmother, her girlfriends who became mothers and her mother’s two best friends, who have always been there for her…
This year, Léane Labrèche-Dor will experience her birthday for the first time as a mother.
“Man, that’s something,” she laughs. It will make me so happy to be told congratulations on being a mother! Not to be a good mother – we all do our best – but it’s the patent I put the most effort into and I’ll be happy to recognize it…”
Will motherhood influence the thoughts she has for her own mother on the morning of May 8?
“It has already changed everything,” she replies. Having a child transformed my perspective on my mother, but also on the bond she had with me. Without understanding what she went through, it gives me an extra layer of empathy…”
Happy Mother’s Day, therefore, to all those who are doing their best.
And good day (despite everything) to those who are trying today to deal with the absence of one of the women in their lives…