INVESTIGATION. Parents of children victims of school bullying targeted by social surveys

This morning of August 16, 2023, in the torpor of the holidays, Béatrice is in shock. This mother of two children, working in the medical field, receives a letter on letterhead from her department. “It was an official letter from child welfare, informing us that my husband and I had been summoned following a report of worrying information about our child. At that moment, we fell from ten floors”, she remembers. Very worried, the parents searched in vain in the mail for what motivated this investigation. They learned this a few weeks later, in the office of the two social workers who received them for their first interview organized without the presence of their child.

The ordeal of “Marie”

This is the college where their youngest daughter, Marie*, aged 13, was educated in class 5^e until June 2023, who made a report to the public prosecutor’s office for school harassment, with a copy to the Cell for Collecting Concerning Information (CRIP**). The problem is that their daughter is not the author of the harassment committed at her school, but that she is the victim. The social workers tell the parents that this is not an error. They are indeed responsible for verifying that their daughter’s suffering is not due to family violence, and that her parents are doing what is necessary to ensure that she gets better.

They then recall the facts. Marie’s harassment at college dates back to early October 2022. “My daughter told me about difficulties she encountered with two girls in her class. It happened in sports class”, remembers Béatrice. What follows is a standoff that will last all year between the parents of the young victim and the educational team. The mother sends dozens of emails to warn about the events suffered by her daughter. The principal of the establishment and the principal education advisor (CPE) undertake to be attentive, to carry out an investigation at the college and to trigger the anti-harassment system. But according to the parents, nothing is happening. The harassment continues and the group of harassers grows. “They go from two to four girls to attack Marie”, remembers the mother. As the weeks go by, her daughter gets worse and worse : “She starts having trouble sleeping, losing weight. Then she says she doesn’t want to go to college anymore”, continues Béatrice. In mid-December, her daughter scarified her wrist with scissors.

We had to wait until March 2023, six months later, after the parents contacted the anti-harassment telephone platform, for the college management to summon the accused students and threaten to expel them. One of them stops harassing Marie, but the other three continue, according to the student’s mother. The principal then suggests that her daughter change classes. The mother refuses, arguing that it is not up to her, the victim, to do it, but to the young girls who attack her***. In mid-June, Marie said she had “dark thoughts” and claims that she is going to throw herself from the top of the college roof. Her child psychiatrist takes her out of school until the summer holidays. Then, his mother filed a complaint for harassment.

A few days later, the college made a report of harassment to the public prosecutor’s office, as required by law, and sent a copy to the cell for collecting worrying information in its department. This is how parents find themselves having to justify to social workers that they are taking good care of their daughter. “After a visit to our home to speak with our two children individually in their room, the two social workers reassured us by telling us that they were going to request a dismissal from the prosecution”, explains the mother, relieved. As for young Marie, she started school at a new college. However, the young girl has difficulty getting back on track. She follows antidepressant treatment and regularly stays at the child psychiatric hospital.

Other cases of reports

The case of Marie’s parents is not isolated. The Radio France investigation unit has identified several other families targeted by worrying information whose investigation has also been closed. Thus Mathilde*’s parents also received a summons from social services in 2021, after having alerted the primary school on numerous occasions about the harassment to which their daughter was subject for several months at CP. “From the start of the 2020 school year, she regularly complained about being hit, in the stomach and at eye level, during recess, by two classmates”, says the father. Until this day in May 2021, when her mother picks her up from school : “Covid obliges, she wore a mask, and heatwave obliges, she had her cap”, she specifies. Arriving home, she realizes that her daughter has “right eye very swollen, red and painful”. Parents call the school to find out what happened. “We are told that there is nothing, and that they returned it to us in good condition.”

Exasperated, the father then files a complaint for harassment. “It had to stop, he explains. Several times, we had warned that our daughter was being hit in the stomach and legs, that she had bite marks and scratches. That famous evening when she came home with a black eye, I said stop, it’s too much.” For its part, the school maintains its version. The incident report that the Radio France investigation unit was able to consult specifies : “Mathilde did not come to complain about any incident to any teacher at the school. (…) No other child reported an incident. The mother came to pick up Mathilde at 4:30 p.m. and did not question the teacher regarding possible marks on the faces or on the body.”

A few days later, the primary school transmitted worrying information to social services. The parents immediately receive a summons from child welfare. It is written there: “As part of the social action code relating to the protection of minors in danger, information relating to possible difficulties that you are encountering with your child Mathilde has reached the centralized cell of worrying information of the Departmental Council of your home . My department has been designated to assess the situation with you and offer you any appropriate assistance.”

Even today, the father is very shocked: “I was at the bottom of the building. My neighbor comes down and sees me. I’m not in my normal state. I show her the letter. She looks at me and says : ‘You know what it is ?’ I answer him : ‘They’re sending social services to my house.'” The social workers will organize several meetings outside and at the parents’ home and will interview all members of the family, separately and together. “It’s very intrusivedeclares the mother. We are asked to tell our story since our childhood. How we met. Our life as a couple before having our children. How did my pregnancies go? How were our relationships with our parents, our relationships with the school.”

“We felt very demeaned”

Mathilde’s parents understand that the father is suspected of violence against his daughter. This is indicated on the transmission form drawn up by the educational establishment that the Radio France investigation unit obtained. But the interview between the social workers and the little girl will change everything: “The school report specifies that your daughter is afraid of adults. However, we have noted that she laughs, talks, is comfortable with adults.” Once again, therefore, the matter will go no further. The classification report indicates that Mathilde appears as a “little smiling girl”which expresses itself “easily”, that the parents’ concern is the well-being of their children, that they listen to the advice provided by professionals. The report concludes that the father is not brutal with his daughter: “Parents do not need educational support”we can read.

The parents are relieved. However, they filed a complaint against X for slanderous denunciation. “We felt very demeaned”confides the father, who feared losing his children during the investigation. “When we went shoppinghe continues, it felt like everyone was looking at us. And if we refused to let the kids see the toys or buy candy, people would call social services to report us.”

Children also worry when they learn that a social worker is coming to their home. “That means we can be placed with a foster family ?”asked another little boy who was a victim of harassment to his parents who were visited by social services as part of another investigation which, again, was closed.

Parents of “HPI” children also targeted

Parents of “different” children, because they have high intellectual potential (HPI) or suffer from attention disorders, have also had the painful experience. Because of their difference, these children are often harassed by other students, as a Parisian child psychiatrist notes: “I have had several cases recently of children with behavioral difficulties. They have poorly controlled impulsivity and are not easy for others to get along with.he tells us. The parents were not well received and the situation turned against them. They were suspected of being abusive and of having caused their child’s situation because they were bad parents. And it ended with a report and a social investigation which was closed.”

Contacted, the office of Gabriel Attal, the Minister of National Education, responded by email to the Radio France investigation unit: “The situation you describe corresponds to a reality of which the minister is aware and which he disapproves of. The Ministry of National Education does not encourage school heads to provide worrying information about student victims, quite the contrary “we are told.

The ministry’s website offers online resources and a national telephone platform for listening and reporting : 3018.

First names have been changed

(**) The CRIP, the cell for collecting worrying information, in each department is responsible for collecting and evaluating all information relating to a minor in danger or at risk of being in danger. Any person, citizen or childcare professional can enter it.

(***) The principal of Marie’s college having died since the events, the academy does not wish to communicate on this matter. In an email that the Radio France investigation unit obtained, the principal wrote in March 2023 to Marie’s parents that the establishment “is implementing the monitoring of this child as closely as possible to her difficulties” and that the situation ” is very complex, although it has stabilized thanks to our vigilance.”

Alert the Radio France investigation unit: