The stupid news of the year

You’re going to say it’s a joke.

That I was fooled.

That I mistook fake news for real.

Well no.

It’s true indeed.

Here’s what Agence France-Presse told us this week…

“Scientists believe that the current range of emojis available does not accurately represent the extent of biodiversity observed in nature, which is harming conservation efforts.”

NOT ENOUGH MUSHROOMS!

You read correctly.

According to biologists from the University of Milan, who published a serious study in an American scientific journal, there are too many vertebrate animals in the panel of emojis (those pictograms that we use in our emails to express certain emotions ) and not enough insects, fungi, crustaceans and microorganisms.

“While the biodiversity crisis may seem distant from life online, in our increasingly digitalized society, we should not underestimate the potential of emojis to raise awareness and promote the diversity of life on Earth,” they say. -they.

Yep.

I said yesterday that some people believe that it is enough to burn a wax statue of Gérard Depardieu to reduce the number of sexual assaults.

Well now, scientists tell us (in a straight face) that the under-representation of lobsters and ants in the emoji panel threatens biodiversity on Earth.

Yes sir.

There are 1% of short people in the world?

There must be 1% of short people in TV commercials.

Mushrooms represent 19% of living species on Earth?

So 19% of available emojis must represent mushrooms.

We are there.

This is the politics of representativeness pushed to its extreme limit.

🙂

After that, people will tell me that the Woke movement should be taken seriously.

Well yes, Thing.

I’m sure that soon, if not already, we will be told that black people who walk around with a white cane, obese non-binary people and redheads are underrepresented in emojis, dolls, billboards on the side of highways, boards of directors of state corporations, professional lawn bowling teams and sadomasos videos available on Pornhub.

Hey, we should force state employees to use 10 mushroom emojis per week in their emails.

In order to protect biodiversity.

And not just well-known mushrooms like porcini mushrooms or chanterelles, no.

But shield entoloms, annatto-colored cortinaria and inverted clitocybes.

Without forgetting, of course, the mushrooms that grow in our schools.

RETURN OF THE BALANCER

I don’t know about you, but when I read this kind of news, it makes me happy.

I have honey-colored armillaria that is wriggling.

Because I tell myself that the more we get out of such nonsense, the sooner the pendulum will return to the center.

At some point, people are going to get fed up with this nonsense.

Do you like nature, scientific friends? Do you want to protect crustaceans, microorganisms and insects?

Well, start by stopping buggering flies.


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