Émilie Perreault admits to being proud. Laughing at herself has never been easy for her. Then there was Hans…
It was his son who inspired Henrigolothe first youth album from the host, cultural journalist and author. In the magnificent book published by Fonfon, we follow a boy ready to make people laugh at him if it can light up the faces of others. All that matters is spreading joy!
“One day, Hans came back from school and said to me: ‘You know, mom, I make people laugh at me’,” says Émilie Perreault. She immediately thought about intervening, hurt by the idea that her son could be bullied, but she let him tell his story… Then, she understood that he was happy to have been able to make someone laugh one who did not have an easy smile.
Pure generosity, mixed with an impressive absence of ego.
The anecdote allowed Émilie to measure the extent of her child’s self-deprecation, even though she was a long way off in this regard…
Hans loves dressing up. I bought him an inflatable SpongeBob costume for Halloween and, in the middle of August, he asked me if he could wear it to go for a walk on Mont-Royal Avenue. I had no reason to tell him no, other than it was embarrassing for me… I saw my son spreading happiness for an hour. People were taking photos, smiling, talking to him. He was right, not me!
Émilie Perreault
How can we put aside our pride and learn to make fun of ourselves? For Émilie Perreault, self-deprecation has become a skill to develop. But why do we particularly value this form of humor?
The author thought for a moment before answering me: “There is an act of courage in that. This calls for a certain humility, we perhaps get a little closer to the truth. »
I also asked Lucie Joubert, director of the Humor Observatory.
“It’s a comfortable posture, for oneself and for those around you; we see it as a way of laughing with others rather than laughing at others. We value self-deprecation because we say to ourselves: this person sees his own faults before talking about what is wrong with his neighbor. »
If the essayist completely subscribes to this idea, she nevertheless expresses a caveat regarding the valorization of self-deprecation in women.
“Humor is a power, we know that. However, this power was until not so long ago exclusively male and the roles were very clear: men made the jokes, women laughed at them. At best, women were tolerated as humorists as long as they only laughed at themselves. […] In this regard, Hannah Gadsby is a model: the Australian said in the middle of the show that she was sick of being self-deprecating. She regretted systematically choosing herself as a target because even if it’s done under the guise of humor, it can be cruel. »
Does self-deprecation carry the same weight for everyone?
Émilie Perreault thought about the question. She finds the speech of the comedian Hannah Gadsby (taken from her wonderful show Nanette) completely valid and even observes a cultural impact in her own difficulty laughing at herself. She summarizes for me a comment left under one of her Instagram posts: “As girls, we were raised with the pressure to be adequate. If you laugh at one of my foibles, I feel that I am not. »
To laugh at yourself, you must therefore get rid of the sirens of perfection, without falling into self-flagellation.
“In my opinion, being cruel to oneself, even to make people laugh, is a very insidious form of belittling which can serve to crystallize what I call “self-hatred”, continues Lucie Joubert. Girls have a hard time loving themselves the way they are (physically and mentally). Humor serves as a relief for them, perhaps, but are they really obliged to denigrate themselves? If we talk about self-deprecation as an affectionate look at our shortcomings, a kind of benevolent awareness of our faults, I agree. It’s proof that we don’t take ourselves seriously and that we don’t consider ourselves above the fray. But then everyone should experience it […] The more power we have, the less tempting the exercise is. Self-deprecation also means accepting to place yourself in a vulnerable situation. »
TRUE ! But as Émilie Perreault points out to me, it can also be a regain of control. I will be the first to laugh at what has just happened to me…
For her, it is about de-dramatizing situations, then becoming aware of the fabulous contagion that sincere laughter has, even if it is caused by one of our faults. In this sense, Henrigolo responds very well to the mandate.
The book is full of information on laughter, the relationship that the Innu people have with it and the way in which it can change the state of things. Everything is magnificently illustrated by Josée Bisaillon, who filled the pages with good visual jokes…
“I would never have shown up in the toilet,” says Émilie Perreault, praising humor and its sidekick. She’s a laugher! A child laughs on average 300 times a day and an adult, around 20 times. Knowing this, Josée Bisaillon must be 4 years old! »
Maybe we should all aim to be 4, deep down. (If you are a man of power, you can imagine me taking an extra second to look at you, especially you, with a tender smile.)
Henrigolo
Fonfon
32 pages