The independent commission on sexual violence against children has collected nearly 27,000 testimonies over the past three years. In a summary, she insists on the importance of the response of the person to whom the child confides.
The vast majority have not heard these words : “I believe you, I protect you.” People who were victims of sexual violence in their childhood did not benefit from “positive social support” when revealing the facts that in “8%” cases, reveals a report from the Independent Commission on Incest and Sexual Violence Against Children (Ciivise), published Thursday September 21. This document summarizes nearly 27,000 testimonies collected as part of the Ciivise’s call for testimonies launched three years ago. The conclusion is clear : “The analysis of the testimonies confirms the importance of the response of the person in whom the child confides. Unfortunately, it highlights that, most often, this response is not protective”point out the authors.
For three years, victims and relatives of victims spoke in 24 public meetings organized throughout France. Many others responded in writing or by telephone. “What these witnesses show us clearly is that sexual violence is never a face-to-face encounter between an aggressor and a victim. There is always a third party. Whether it is a person close to the child, an institution or society as a whole”analyzes the Ciivise.
“The importance of the positioning of the third party reveals the political dimension of sexual violence against children. This is not primarily a private matter, it is a problem of public order and public health.”
The Independent Commission on Incest and Sexual Violence Against Childrenin his report
Believing the child when he reveals sexual violence suffered is one thing, protecting him is another, underlines the Ciivise. If seven out of ten confidants believe the child, almost one in two victims “is not put[e] safe and not receiving care”evaluates the report. “In almost 50% of testimonies, the confidant does not reassure the child: he asks him not to talk about it (27%) and even places the blame on him (22%).” According to the Ciivise, this is particularly the case for incest: “In almost one in two cases, rapes and sexual assaults are committed in the presence or with the knowledge of other family members.”
Sometimes the disbelief of those around you is also “a way to protect yourself”. “I am the mother of three children, including a little girl who revealed to me that she was incested by her father. I did not believe her at the time because it was too violent for me”, testified a woman to the Ciivise. LWhen the confidant places the blame on the victim, the victim can develop self-destructive behavior: 39% have addictions (drugs, medication, alcohol, etc.) compared to one in four people, when the victim has been protected, notes the Civilization.
“An ancestral denial”
Mothers are the first confidants in these situations. They themselves are not sufficiently protected, points out the independent commission. When they turn to early childhood or justice professionals, they are often “accused of manipulating their child and the institutions”. And sometimes lose custody, or are even prosecuted if they refuse to present their child to the ex-spouse accused of incestuous violence. This is why these revelations give rise to few complaints. “More than six out of six confidants (62%) stop the violence but do not file a complaint”notes the report.
Confiding directly with professionals is no guarantee of enhanced protection. “Nearly six in ten did not protect the child following the revelation of the violence (58%)”, we can read in the document. On the other hand, those who act are more inclined to file a complaint. This is why, according to the commission, it is essential to provide them with tools such as the training booklet “Mélissa and the others”, published by the Ciivise, and to “guarantee a clear and national doctrine to strengthen the level of protection of all children”.
The commission, which recalls the “cost” of “denial” sexual violence against children, “9.7 billion euros”is worried about his own disappearance after the submission of his final report, scheduled for November 20. “Who can still believe that two years, three years, will have been enough to get society out of this ancestral denial?” asks Ciivise, which since 2021 has been able to provide a space for listening and “unconditional social support” to the victims. In a column published this month, around sixty personalities called for its maintenance, including Camille Kouchner, Emmanuelle Béart and Vanessa Springora. “To shut up is to say to the victims: ‘We have heard you enough’”they write.