What have we done to our boys?

I am a psychologist. And, for several days, I have been appalled. What have we done to our boys? What did we do to make them feel like killing at 15-16? What didn’t we do to make them kill?



Lise Marcotte

Lise Marcotte
Psychologist

Have they been intimidated, abused, intoxicated, manipulated, neglected, witnesses of violence in their family, in their community?

Have they been used to violence, numb? Have they been left for too long in front of screens to kill virtually, to see hyperviolent images, films with disproportionate monsters and full of teleseries with weapons, explosions, shootings, murders, rapes, suicides, assassins, avengers, serial killers, criminals, terrible warriors? Have they chosen (unconsciously) to identify with the strongest so as not to collapse? Do they have too many role models, idols who yell, curse, intimidate, speak hatefully and make death threats?

Do we know what they are going through and what they have been through? Why are they killing? Why are they killing so young?

Do we know what this one, that one, or that other child aged 7 or 10 or 14 lives at home, at school, in his neighborhood? What does he do with his time, what he feels, how he sees himself in the future, what leads him or will lead him to want to kill?

I would like us to take more care of them. I would like us to see them being or becoming angry, disillusioned, aggressive, violent, closed, depressed, helpless, mixed up, confused… before they think of killing or… of dying.

Let us simply see them. Let us see that they exist with their misery and their heaviness. Let them be “screened” as we say in psychology. And that we know how to take care of them when they are small, and when they grow up. Help them where they are most of the time: at school!

May there be benevolent “brigades” in these schools. Teams of psychologists, social workers, remedial teachers, speech therapists, psychoeducators, sexologists, guidance counselors and nurses who work together to help children and adolescents.

There are enough professionals to offer individual treatments to such and such a child who thinks he is “not intelligent” because he has a dyslexia problem or an attention deficit disorder, to another who has enormous difficulty in controlling his impulses, to another who is neglected or poorly supervised at home, to another who makes him laugh at him because he has language difficulties.

Psychologists numerous enough to do not only interviews for diagnostic evaluations and recommendations (as is currently the case), but also meetings with children and adolescents for preventive and therapeutic care. Psychotherapies without waiting and at no cost to parents.

These school support services already existed. I was part of one of those caregivers’ groups. We did psychotherapy at the elementary and secondary levels. We went to families. We have trained workers in humanist approaches. We have organized camps for some students outside of schools to foster their attachment to others and enrich their interpersonal skills.

The problem of recruiting psychologists in schools began a long time ago with the cuts in the public sector. And it was greatly accentuated when the diploma to become a psychologist went from a “master’s” to a “doctorate”, lengthening the duration of studies and discouraging many people from pursuing a career in this field. In my opinion, we should go back to the master’s degree to increase the number of psychologists available again. And put back the “school psychology” profile as an option in specialized fields in psychology. These are requests that I would make of the Minister of Higher Education and the spokespersons of the other political parties in this area.

As for parents, they should know that, united for a cause, they have great powers to influence the authorities. I encourage them to demand fast and free professional services in schools in order to prevent ill-being and very great misfortunes.


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