I asked people around me if they remember the time when their great love said “I love you” to them for the first time. The context, the embarrassment, the happiness, another reaction? Or the first “I love you” they decided to say. Because that’s the thing, han: if one of the two doesn’t throw himself away, it’s not going to happen.
Unless both say it at the exact same time. This is what I experienced with the father of my children: a first “I love you” which had absolutely nothing intense, but which had this particularity… of being at the same time . Like the relationship that followed, I would say. For a few years, life was easy, our movements were done with a certain synchronicity. A first “I love you” singular, but which was not a guarantee of longevity… We are no longer together today.
“ Cuuute ! exclaimed a friend, when I opened the subject to know her story with her fiancé. “But I’m embarrassed, like,” she continued, which really made me smile. My friend with a spectacular vocabulary, always impeccable French… was suddenly speaking like a teenager watching Watatatow in the 1990s. Remembering the intimate scene can sometimes make you melt again. Cute yourself !
I’ve learned that a lot of lovers, surprisingly, don’t remember the first “I love you.” “No memory, even vague, but in any case, he must have arrived very quickly, because a week after our meeting, he never went back to sleep at home,” my mother told me about my stepfather. “And since we’ve said it every day for 35 years, there must have been at least 12,000 others afterwards,” she calculates at my request. (Hihihi.)
Another relative told me what I thought was impossible: the halfway “I love you”. And no, it’s not the famous “I like you” (which we never want to know, by the way). They had just experienced a magnificent moment of tenderness (making love, for real), and she was waiting for them, the famous two syllables. It couldn’t be made any clearer, you know? They were there. The catch: she didn’t want to say it first. But she was definitely not going to take her eyes off him when they looked at each other deeply. As if to say: “aweille, you’re ready”. And he responds to the silence… “Me too. (“You too WHAT?!”) “Bin, me too, you know! »
Well, another one who doesn’t want to say it first… Why?
“Because you don’t want to be rejected, simple as that. So we give each other the time they need, and when it happens, it’s immense happiness, downright relief. »
Do those who don’t say it first generally have more fear of rejection in their lives? I ask the question without being able to answer it.
But I’m going to tell you the most amazing “I love you” in my story. He is recent, with a little girl around me. I wasn’t expecting it and I wasn’t expecting it either, I was giving it time. I was going to do little pi, in the moon, when I saw her in the hallway. A bit like a little girl who appears wearing an old dress in a horror movie (minus the two braids): she has a message to convey, and it is better that I listen to her.
“I love you,” she said clearly, but very quickly. Immediately heard, immediately in my arms, and immediately the tears that flowed everywhere. And there, my pre-teen to throw away: “We were playing corner-corner and it was her consequence: she had to say “I love you” to someone. »
Ouch. But I kept squeezing it anyway.
– What, my little cursed? ! Are you saying “I love you” to me for the first time because someone made you do it? Worse: because I was passing by? !!
— Nooo. But yes, but no… Because I swear to you, Maya… It’s true. Really true.
Sometimes that’s what it takes. Child’s play, life changing.