Clearance operation
If you really want to leave, there’s no need to fall into big philosophical conversations about the meaning of your life… Get straight to the point and shoot! If there is still the slightest chance of rekindling the flame, it will be on the hearth of sincerity. Say what you think deep down, what you’ve never said to him before. Remorse, deep jealousy towards a friend… It’s hard, but it’s also relieving.
Back to basics
You must necessarily ask yourself the question of the ties that bind you to your other half. How were they yesterday, how are they today, how do you see them tomorrow?
The question is whether it is possible to find the initial pattern, the one where you fell in love. What did you like that you no longer have? Can you mourn it and is it possible for you to consider a new way of living with him, like “everyone at home”? Thinking about such questions is easier alone, in front of yourself.
It is therefore best to take a break for at least a few days.
Pro time
If there’s ever a time when seeing a couples therapist is important, it’s when one of you wants to leave! We know, it’s off-putting and sometimes a little expensive. But we swear: it’s very effective and the problem can be targeted in just a few sessions.
We recommend the new coopleo.care platform, a sort of Doctolib for couples which allows you to find a professional in your area very easily.
The honest friend, to clear the way
Don’t think you’re someone who knows you better than anyone else… That’s not true. We are never completely objective with ourselves, and it’s always easier to see the stains on other people’s collars than on our own. So you need… good advice. For this, go to a frank, but deeply well-intentioned person.
She will pinpoint all the less than classy words or behavior you have had, as well as your contradictions. It puts things into perspective, and that’s always good.
Anabelle Gentez