Saying “no” on a daily basis is not necessarily easy. At work, to family or friends, we may be afraid to say “no” when we are called upon. This can be the result of a lack of assertiveness, a fear of conflict or rejection … But why does a two year old say it without a problem and not us?
Julie Lancel, personal development coach, suggests you use the non-positive method : It is a question of surrounding the “no” with two “yes”.
1. a welcoming yes: “yes, I hear your request”
2. the no that we want to issue: “no, it is not possible for me to respond to your request” (argue if necessary or to reassure yourself)
3. an open yes by proposing an alternative: “yes I understand that you are disappointed, have you thought of …”
The important thing is to respect each person and to listen to yourself and to the other.
Knowing how to say “no” also means giving value to a “yes”