“The worst is to be expected. And it is time for society to face it.”, said Wednesday, November 17 on franceinfo Laurent Boyer, victim and member of the Independent Commission on Incest and Sexual Violence against Children (Ciivise), while the Ciivise has identified 6,200 testimonies of adults victims of sexual violence or incest when they were children, since the launch of the call for testimonies on September 21. “When we submit our report at the beginning of 2023, a tsunami will land on society”, Laurent Boyer alert. He believes that the Ciivise “is expected”. “We are a bearer of hope. We should not disappoint.”
franceinfo: Are you surprised by the extent of the testimonies you have received?
Laurent Boyer: No, I am not surprised because indeed, we expected this wave. We spend our time saying that there are 165,000 children who are victims of sexual violence every year, especially in their families. So we are not really surprised. We are happy to be able to put them on the table to say that finally, when we are going to submit our report at the beginning of 2023, a tsunami is going to land on society. She must prepare for it. This first number shows us how much the worst is to be expected. And it is time for society to face it.
With your work, do you want to make incest situations come true?
Yes, give it a reality. And then, for once, it’s giving a voice to these victims. For them, this is really a huge step. Often, they say it when they are heard, it is a step for them, a victory to be heard by an independent commission. We can be dizzy when faced with these figures, but we really have to understand them. And that is the goal of our work: to make sure that the company prepares for what we are going to unveil in a few months.
What struck you in these testimonies?
These stories are different, but ultimately they come together. It’s always the same thing, these stories of children who are victims, who, because their attackers, who are in their family, ask them to remain silent, keep silent. Because a child believes his brother, believes his father, believes his uncle. And then, there are years and years of silence, of shame, of guilt. This fear of jumping into the void when you release your word, it’s like throwing yourself into the void, this fear of having an endless fall. The stories are different, but they all come together.
Did these victims think that being silent was the best solution?
Yes, because it’s comfortable, silence. We do not realize when we are in this silence that in fact it ends up asphyxiating us and that it will end up killing us if we do not get out of it. We believe it is easier to remain silent. However, and this is what I want to say every time: the only way for a victim to get out is to free his word. Yes, it is scary. Yes, it can hurt.
Does your personal experience help you to collect these testimonies or to understand this situation?
She helps us put ourselves in our shoes. Because that’s what is always complicated for victims, it’s to put themselves in their shoes, to understand. Often we are told, ‘but why have you been silent for so many years?’ It seems impossible to remain silent when one is the victim of such serious facts. And in the face of its victims, having experienced that yourself makes it possible to understand and be even more attentive to them and also sometimes to better understand their silence. The goal for us is both that these testimonies serve the victims who come to deliver them to us, but also serve our work to make the best proposals. It is important. We are expected, we all feel it, we receive messages. We are a bearer of hope. We should not disappoint.