In the shoes of “corner” punishment, at the heart of the debates of parenting specialists

The “Time out”, dead time, stopping time, more vulgarly known under the expression: “Go to your room“, or its famous variant: “You go around the corner“. In short, I am without doubt one of the oldest punishments in the world. And I am learning this week in Le Figaro that after the whipping and the spanking, it’s me who risks being punished by my parents.

The Council of Europe, even today, recommends me in one of its brochures as an example of good parental practice of non-violent punishment. “Children do better when their parents are loving and supportive, and when they respond to their misbehavior by explaining why and using non-violent punishments, such as time-outs, when necessary.“, writes the European institution. This is what the official doctrine has been until now. Except that as a good student of parenthood, they now plan to send me to the picket line, with a dunce cap on my head.

Until now I was not the priority. It must be said that in France, spanking was only banned in 2019, but in reality I am at the heart of the debates between parenting specialists. On the one hand, those who denounce what they call ordinary educational violence. According to them, a child will necessarily experience isolation as a humiliation, and will come out of it with the feeling of having been naughty, which could only lead to resentment.

On the other hand, those who, relying precisely on the Council of Europe but also on the recommendations of the American Academy of Psychiatry, present me on the contrary as an effective strategy for setting limits.

Are we moving towards a ban on sending children to their rooms? It’s not on the agenda. Moreover, even National Education always allows to isolate a child from the group to find calm in the class. As for the Council of Europe, after discussing a review of its position in the near future with a journalist and associations, it is now trying to backpedal, claiming that I am not one of its priorities. A way of not positioning yourself.

But if the debate is not settled, the question is now on the table: is isolating a child a form of humiliation? If the answer was yes, then I could be considered emotional abuse. And the parents should learn to do without me, like they did with the spanking. But for now I’m still relevant, so be wise, I’m watching you!


source site-14