Today you are going to suggest that we ignore the opinions of others, so as not to “shake” our self-confidence? That’s it ! For many of us, since childhood, have been raised, educated by making sure to take into account the opinions of others. However, the opinion of others very often undermines the confidence we have in ourselves.
Does that mean that we give too much importance to the opinion of others?
Let’s say we need validation from others about our feelings, or our own opinions.
For example: you are going to a party, you are getting ready: you have put on your best shirt or your best dress and in front of the mirror you are on top. If you have a loved one with you, you will most certainly ask their opinion, a validation.
However, if the opinion of the other does not correspond to your own opinion, then your self-confidence will waver a little, and if your self-confidence is not solid, you will be destabilized.
Is this where you start to doubt yourself?
Yes, because most of the time, when the opinion of the other is not fitting with ours, we feel criticized. If we tolerate criticism we do not accept, but not at all to be criticized;
Is it because we constantly seek recognition from others?
Yes, in a way: the unconscious need to feel accepted or loved is often at the heart of the problem.
It is important to work on discernment. The opinion of others is necessary to establish good relations, because it enriches our open-mindedness. Hearing the other, listening to him, does not mean that we are in agreement.
What exercise could you suggest to us so that the opinion of others does not make us lose confidence in ourselves?
Well, I invite you for a week to ask for the opinion, the opinion of your loved ones on the decisions you make, on what you think of such and such a situation that you are personally experiencing, being well anchored, feet on the floor, breathing calmly and welcoming the answer as only the person’s opinion and not a truth. Self-confidence cannot be decreed, it is built!