Faced with climate change, some take the bull by the horns and stop flying or suddenly reduce their consumption. Such changes can help turn the tide, but sometimes generate negative reactions. How do you go about changing your habits without offending those around you or feeling like you’re punishing yourself?
Michèle Boudrias admits it straight away: she wouldn’t be the person she is today if she hadn’t traveled to Asia from the mid-1970s. my eyes on a large number of things, on values such as mutual aid, which I have decided to integrate. »
After a remarkable stay in Sri Lanka in 1976, the one who worked for a long time in the world of education visited India several times, and made trips to Europe, particularly to Italy, as well as to Mexico, Jamaica, in Haiti, Morocco, etc.
Four years ago, after the birth of her grandchildren, the one who has just turned 70, however, decided to stop flying. “The despair of seeing a child talk to you about climate change and tell you that the planet is going to explode” convinced her.
An assumed decision… which remains emotional. “It’s atrocious not to travel,” she says before swallowing a sob. It is true that I have the impression of depriving myself. “But she holds on:” I have reached the stage where I want to reduce [mon empreinte] wherever I am able, ”adds the one who also limits her consumption by going to bulk grocery stores and buying mainly second-hand goods.
But there is no question for her of imposing her choices on others: “I don’t want to confront the people I love, it would be unbearable… I prefer to invite my loved ones to take part in a demonstration rather than talking to them about stopping traveling. . »
Avoid the stubbornness
Psychologist Inês Lopes, who is also an education consultant for the environment and social issues, welcomes Ms.me Budrias. You can inform your loved ones, even try to convince them to adopt new behaviors, but you have to accept that you have no control over their opinions and actions, she says. Relentlessness can lead to exhaustion, frustration, isolation and even conflict.
PHOTO DANIEL LANTEIGNE, PROVIDED BY INÊS LOPES
Inês Lopes, psychologist
Twisting an arm might cause some squabbling at a Christmas dinner, but it won’t do much good.
Inês Lopes, psychologist
The realities of each are not the same, also recalls the psychologist. Stopping flying at 70, after having traveled for a long time, is difficult, but perhaps not as difficult as for a young adult or someone who has just moved to a new country. “Do we have the right to ask an immigrant never to go see his family again? asks the DD Lopez.
The spouse of Michèle Boudrias has a little trouble mourning their trips abroad, even if she swears that she will never prevent him from leaving alone on his side. Together, they still recently explored the North Shore “with little time, but a fresh look at the inhabitants and the landscapes”, she says.
For Michèle Boudrias, in fact, the key to avoiding having the impression of being punished is there: in discovering what is closer, on foot, by bike or by train, or even meeting people who have come from all over the world who live here.
She also suggests to her relatives who like to go to the four corners of the world to also change their perceptions. “Renting a house with the family in the Gaspé rather than in the south of France is also a trip,” she says, although she knows that her advice sometimes raises eyebrows.
give yourself a chance
If it can sometimes seem painful, renunciation “by conviction” is also a source of happiness, affirms Inês Lopes. “Acting in line with one’s values is positive,” she sums up. Still, no one has to be perfect, and everyone can reevaluate their choices if the sacrifices and regrets seem too great. “A person can decide to travel on occasion and put his energies into changing economic systems, laws, […] it is also valid”, she observes.
Does Michèle Boudrias have any regrets? Perhaps never having visited the countries of northern Europe. However, there is no question of succumbing to this desire: she would be too unhappy to betray her commitments. He still has, perhaps, a (thin) hope. “My grandfather said: ‟I will go to Europe the day there will be a bridge”, says the septuagenarian. Me, I would say: ‟I will go to Scandinavia the day we have an electric plane!” »