Behind the door | Sexual creativity has no age

The Press offers you each week a testimony which aims to illustrate what really happens behind the bedroom door, in privacy, far, far from statistics and standards. Today: François*, 70 years old



François is retired, well into his seventies, and he has never been so fulfilled and sexually “creative” in his life.

“I would say that, yes,” he said, smiling, after more than two hours of confidences and as many reflections, comfortably installed in his warm living room. “Never been so active, in such an open and imaginative way! “, he specifies.

He wrote to us earlier this year because he wanted to “share something inspiring”, he begins with that air that people have who take real pleasure in confiding in each other. He knows it: his story is shocking. His friends his age are far from having such a naughty daily life.

For his part, although he has been active all his life, it is only in recent years that he has finally found someone joyfully receptive, with whom to explore in play and joy. This explains that ? Certainly.

I would always have been like that, but it takes a face-to-face!

Francis

As it took him a while to find, we will have understood.

Here: after a few romances (including a flirtation with the mother of one of his friends when he was a teenager!), he got his first blonde at 20 years old. “She gave me my deflowering for my party,” he remembers with a laugh. Their story lasts 10 years, even if, sexually, “nothing remarkable” happens here. At the end of his twenties, they separated, and our man then found himself single, and above all: “So embarrassed! » Imagine: “I’m not a dater and it’s been years since I met people!” »

He describes the decade that followed as a period of “relearning.” The year is 1970, and François is 30 years old. Think: free love and various explorations, and in quantity, and you will have a good idea of ​​the portrait. In particular, he spent some time with a colleague who slept with other men, he illustrates. What if it was heard? “That’s how it was!” “, he answers simply. For his part, he remembers finding himself in a friend’s bed. “In a natural way!” », he adds just as naturally. And then ? “We touched each other a little…” But be careful: “I would never kiss a guy. I really separate the emotional and the sexual! », specifies François. Through it all, he also had a mistress, here and there, for 15 years. “It was fun! »

Let us specify here that our interlocutor remembers the first name of all his flames. And there have been dozens of them over the years. “I have always been very grateful for every person who has slept with me. These were moments of communication. » Certainly, he also experienced a great “emotional desert”, as he says, but all these encounters, even brief ones, were real “oxygen buoys” for him. Far be it from him to see a one-night stand as something “contemptible”. “It matters. It’s not fluttering,” he intellectualizes.

This may seem superficial, but that was not the spirit at all.

Francis

What was the “spirit,” then? Basically, he was trying, he assures, while thinking out loud. He tried to engage, then, due to a lack of common ground, his stories fell through. “You leave with good intention, then… it stops. »

He still spent more than 15 years with a woman with no “interest” in sex (with whom he is still on very good terms, it should be noted). Why does he stay so long, when he obviously has a real interest in the thing? “Because when you live with someone, you don’t want to hurt them…”

And then somewhere around 60 years old, and single again, our man meets yet another woman. Here we are finally. How do they meet? In an organized outdoor activity. But it’s not at all the love at first sight that you might imagine. Quite the opposite: Madame is very reserved, has had little experience, rather modest, she also lacks self-confidence. They really need to “tame” themselves. Their first time, he illustrates, she also keeps her bra on in bed. “I arrived with all my experiences. I talked about certain matters a little to shock her. I sent provocative videos…,” he says, laughing. However, instead of being offended, his partner is rather receptive. “She could have stopped and said to herself: who is this pig? » But no, he congratulates himself: “She has tamed ideas! ”, and in doing so, “discovered the sexual woman in her.” Result: “It gave us a very interesting mode of communication! »

They actually talk a lot about the subject and it has the gift of spicing up their imagination. It “spices it up”, François congratulates himself even more.

Note that in the act, they realize that they are not necessarily made to get along. “We find ourselves with two people who, historically, have found pleasure in giving it to the other,” he explains. As if we hadn’t been formatted to receive it. Suddenly, you are in front of someone sensual, who wants to touch you, you have to learn to receive! »

Both of us must learn to be receptive, at our age!

Francis

But again, that didn’t stop them. Completely the opposite. François, who does not lack imagination, has outright bought handcuffs (among other toys to spice up their antics): “You no longer have a choice, you can no longer be active! »

That’s not all, they also had fun filming themselves in action (“and it’s much better than what you see in porn films!”), and sometimes dared to show off at night in front of a window ( “that’s exciting: maybe they’ll see us!”). Not every evening, of course, but from time to time, “sporadically”. Madame even “worked hard” to become a fountain, and they also had a “threesome” with a friend. ” It is open ! he marvels. She could have blocked herself, but she developed her imagination. […] I had never experienced all this before! “, he beams.

Conclusion: “Even at a ripe old age, you can develop a very pleasant and very satisfying sex life,” says our entertaining interlocutor. The secret ? “The open-mindedness that allows you to explore without condemning…”

* Fictitious first name, to protect anonymity

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