Behind the door | Confidences of a bisexual “loverboy”

Louis* likes women, but finds them complicated. He multiplies the adventures with men, but does not like them. You follow ? Tale of a rocky life. Sadly disappointing ending.

Posted at 4:00 p.m.

Silvia Galipeau

Silvia Galipeau
The Press

Because that’s life, too. It doesn’t always end well, tells us our “disappointed” 68-year-old man, met at the beginning of the summer in a café in Chambly, halfway between our home and his home. “I have decided to retire from women. Why ? Because it’s complicated! But he’s no happier for all that, you’ll see.

Coincidence? Louis wrote to us in response to a story from a bisexual woman he met earlier this year who came to more or less the same conclusions.

You should know that our Louis turned to men late in life. He even tells himself for nearly two good hours without ever approaching the thing, keeping us in suspense with shots of “you will understand” and others “it will come later in my story”.

To everyone who knows me, I’m a ladies’ man. No one would ever think I have a tendency…

Louis, 68 years old

A “trend”, we will eventually grasp, born of a somewhat “crooked” reasoning, to fill a “need”, as he says, but that too will come later in the story.

So here it is: Louis discovers sexuality relatively late and especially on the job. With his first real girlfriend, around 20, it doesn’t “work” for a good six months. They leave each other and Louis finds himself in the bed of an “experienced woman” with whom he finally understands that penetration takes “a little preparation”. He picks up with the previous one (get used to it, these comings and goings will be frequent in his life) and their story lasts five years. The end ? Tragic: in a car accident. “It was a difficult mourning, confides here Louis, his voice suddenly strangled. Especially when you’re young. »

Mid-twenties, therefore, Louis finds himself a widower for the first time (because there will be a second). “And there I say to myself: when you love, you have to say it. The other must feel it. This is where I become a loverboy […]. The woman you love should come first. »

The mourning lasts a year. Then Louis “rediscovers love” with an ephemeral thunderbolt, with which he experiences an intense and brief “mad love”. “We made love six, seven times in 24 hours! We were fucking all the time! Madame le “flushes” nevertheless after three months, following which Louis meets, at his place of work, his future wife, the mother of his children, with whom he spends more than 20 years.

In bed ? Completely the opposite. In 25 years, he won’t be able to make her come once. “She had never masturbated…” And she had never performed oral sex on him either. It must be said that Louis did not ask him. “I didn’t know that! “Besides, he specifies:” Me, I am not a dirty guy. I am a sensual. It’s different. I have the senses on edge. »

And with men, dare we here, to get closer to the subject of interest.

With men? It’s sex. But we are not there yet!

Louis, 68 years old

We spare you the ups and downs of the relationship, which also ends tragically: mid-fifties, Louis finds himself again a widower, his wife having died here of cancer.

This time, the mourning is different. Louis had time to prepare. And don’t waste too much time before meeting again. Here he is again, after a few dates, as a couple, for another seven years. With whom ? The “frigid”, as he says. After a few months, they no longer kiss; as soon as Louis tries to touch her, she pushes him away; and he has hardly ever seen her naked. “But as soon as I see her, I fall in love! », marvels our « loverboy “. “Everything else works! He suspects an abuse in his past, they try therapy together, once, twice, we don’t know how many times. They leave each other, resume, because he loves her, he insists.

Do you see it coming? It was at this precise moment in his life, and with this famous “crooked reasoning” mentioned above, that our Louis turned to men. “I didn’t mean to cheat on her!” But he “needs sex.” And by filling this need with a man, “there is no problem!” “. Better still: “It’s combining business with pleasure!” »

But his “frigid” does not see him with the same eye and their story ends there.

Louis therefore begins with a first massage “with happy ending”, then finds in the classifieds a man offering fellatios. “I had never had one! “, he recalls. The guy in question will eventually become a recurring partner. “And that’s how it starts…”

It’s been 10 years now. Since then, Louis has been dating a few women (while continuing his adventures here and there with men), but each time it gets stuck. A first has consumption concerns, a second compares sexuality to a “sacred temple”, and a third is downright too “german” (although the sexual connection here is unequalled). “It’s too complicated, women! »

All this to say that at the age of 68, after all these failed attempts, it’s decided: “I’m retiring from women”, repeats Louis. And men, is it better? ” Men ? It’s just for sex. I don’t spend my days with it. “If that fills him up? ” Nope. Because it’s not love. There, I have a life without love. And it’s disappointing…”

You were warned.

* Fictitious first name, to protect his anonymity.


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