In the charcuterie section, these are “salamis of easy virtue”. Even my father — known as an anti-feminist because he couldn’t stand Lise Payette — warned me never to depend financially on a man. He was protecting his daughter from the side effects of tales of princesses waiting for their Prince Charming.
But these princes – the mascus – play us again The Flintstones in 2024. They say they represent the silent majority of Quebec men. They are very silent, in fact, with a large 629 subscribers to Lucid Podcast. “We are just the messengers, ultimately. »
Through their caps, a cross of persecuted white people on their necks, these cisgender thirty-somethings talk about matriarchy, porn, seduction. To decree things like: “When you’re in a relationship, you don’t let your girlfriend go to clubs, you don’t let your girlfriend go to festivals, you don’t let your girlfriend show her butt in a G-string on Instagram. »
It sure makes good publicity about domestic violence and coercion. Like: this is the progression in a toxic relationship. Do you see the red flags or do you also have to add the flashing lights?
I even went to see what their “friends” (featured in one episode) looked like, two intelligent girls who agree to play “ trad wifes » while their guys strut their pecs in tank tops and flaunt their Puntacan tans on YouTube. Nothing to complain about, except that…
Everyone knows that the patriarchy is weakening day by day under the guillotine of the hashtag
“While I’m here, my girlfriend is cleaning,” said one of the “lucids” to Sophie Durocher, who had her glottis in turmoil, in an interview on Qub, after adding: “I don’t have time to lose with that. » He brings back the bacon, “in exchange for a little sex in the evening”, he also explained in his podcast. And after that, we wonder why political lesbianism is coming back into fashion.
Those that Sophie called “the boys” specialize in dating ; pros who give training at $95 for 90 minutes at the University of Seduction. And they lay their cards on the table from the first meeting: they have not read Simone de Beauvoir and are not aware that my mother needed her husband’s signature to open a bank account until 1964 and was no longer required to obey him (including marital duty) the day after my birth. We’ve come a long way, baby. Take notes, boys.
Zero gay alphas
For two weeks, I’ve been stuffing myself with episodes of mascus who cause money, LA and Dubai with a muscular porn star, ” boss guy » attracted to less arrogant women, and “esties of #metoo », modeled on Andrew Tate and his clones. I intersperse between my mini feminist strokes commercial breaks of the comedian Arnaud Soly with his friend PO Forget (delicious parody of the alpha gender). The words “zero gay” punctuate the conversation. It relaxes the jaw. Gérard Depardieu would have added: “Are we not well? Peaceful, cool, relaxed on the glans? »
I also read the delicious Slayer of patriarchal joys by comedian Marie-Christine Lemieux-Couture, who is also doing a doctoral thesis in semiology on the violence of online discourse, or how patriarchy is coded into platforms and how it fuels discourse, which makes increasingly sexist and misogynistic positions emerge: incels, pickup artist, masculinists. She defines herself as a 100% woke “anarqueer” feminist. The antichrist for mascus. And I add: 43-year-old mother.
Being funny is already an act of rebellion
His book, taken from his comedy show, is a snub to the patriarchy, to the mascus, to comedians who make fun of the disabled or who are misogynistic in their jokes and their behavior.
And Marie-Christine makes me smile. The tone, the incisive casualness, the intelligence, a vocabulary that will make the pure members of the Saint-Jean-Baptiste Society scream, totally in the zeitgeist of the street, spiced up with Anglo expressions where she explains to us what the pick-up artists of the Lucide type: “he is an unfriendly gentleman who advises gentlemen who would like to associate with women. […] In other words, they are also “pickup” than a Hyundai Accent and also “artists” that the clerk at Subway is a sandwich artist.”
A caricature of masculinity
“It’s easy to make humor with them!” There joke Is made ! They are caricatures, like Trump! » Marie-Christine emphasizes to me in an interview. “One day we realize that bullies of secondary education are replaced by entire systems of oppression to be dismantled and we are far from having finished laughing or crying about it,” she writes in her book.
She adds for my benefit: “It’s less heavy when you can laugh about it, it takes away their influence. Some of them are campaigning for the decriminalization of rape on private property in the United States. » We laugh bitterly.
Ambitious women are unhappy. We don’t want to replace them; we want to put them in their place!
That said, the comedian “ killjoy » (a joy-killer of what makes the patriarchy laugh) thinks that certain masculinists use provocation to capitalize: “The problem is the young people who will take their advice for cash. »
And what about matriarchy? “It’s not based on facts, it’s based on impressions. Their anti-feminist discourse (destruction of the family, crisis of masculinity) is based on arguments and beliefs which construct a reality. Controlling their girlfriend is part of this fantasy reality. »
Indeed, the mascus live in a parallel world where women do not earn less money than men, do not suffer more violence, have no mental burden, and where the boys club does not exist.
Flirting Tips from the Feminist killjoy : “Women are not IKEA furniture that becomes functional when screw B14 is tightened with wrench F342. » And also: “avoid being misogynistic […] It’s a lot easier to seduce a woman when you’ve dealt with the little resentment.”
You know ? The one who makes you look like a privileged frustrated person who still owes something?