To ensure that polyamory is recognized by the general public. This is the ambitious starting idea of the series Polyamory created by Christophe Magnette, therapist in helping relationship, himself polyamorous and also researcher and co-screenwriter of the documentary series. “A lot of people don’t know that it’s a model that can function and live in a very normal and benevolent way”, explains the one who, on several occasions, noticed that his clients did not suspect that polyamory was a thousand miles from the prejudices that stick to his skin.
“There are still a lot of amalgams between polyamory and polygamy, for example,” adds the screenwriter and content producer of the show Maude-Émilie St-Pierre. To counter received ideas, the team of Polyamory therefore worked hard to lay the foundations of this rich and complex relational model. “If only to understand what a polycule is [terme qui inclut toutes les personnes liées par une relation au sein d’un groupe polyamoureux] and how polyamory works,” she adds. From the second episode, viewers are invited to get to the heart of the matter with this famous question that everyone has in mind: are polyamorous relationships spared from jealousy? ” It is not the case at all ! It’s just that polyamorous people have learned to develop tools for living with jealousy, which can be very difficult to live with, but also very interesting,” she replies.
Furthermore, sexuality within polyamorous relationships is frequently discussed by those who are not concerned. “It’s a real sensitivity in this community, and we wanted to respect it. This is also another stubborn prejudice, because people often associate polyamory with a sex story,” underlines Maude-Émilie St-Pierre. And to continue: “I have no regrets that we did this episode because we managed to deconstruct the image that links polyamory to the search for a very active sexuality. “Asexuality, co-sleeping… for the screenwriter and content producer, it’s less a question of quantity than of diversity. “Some people consider themselves in a continuum of polyamory, therefore in the same polycule, but do not have sexual relations”, she says.
For his part, Christophe Magnette notes that there are no documentaries that go as far in exploring polyamory as in his series. “Of course, there is a little ten-minute report on polyamory on the news from time to time, but something that shows it in all its diversity, it can’t be found,” he says. If the therapist does not want to throw flowers, he nevertheless confides to being quite proud to have been at the end of things.
On the importance of participants
Since he did the research for the documentary series and collaborated on the screenplay with Maude-Émilie St-Pierre, it quickly seemed logical for Christophe Magnette to appear on screen for his role as therapist. “We thought it would be cool that there is a therapeutic axis. That’s a lot of caps for me and I was stressed doing it, but I thought it made sense, ”he says. According to him, his appearances on camera are a continuation of those who dared to reveal themselves to Polyamory. “I find the people we approached very courageous and who come forward with their intimacy and their vulnerability,” he says, adding that many of those contacted eventually withdrew from the project for fear of reprisals. “A lot of people have told me that they actually weren’t comfortable because of their job or their ex-spouses, in particular. »
Christophe Magnette even believes that the participants in the documentary are almost militants. “I don’t like to use that word too much, but they know why they did it: it’s not for them, but to show that this relational model is something that exists”, he specifies. As for Maude-Émilie St-Pierre, she recalls the role of the community in the representation of polyamory. “Not to idealize it, but to democratize it. This is what our speakers did by recounting some of the more difficult moments in their lives. Also so that people at home can tell themselves that it suits them, or not, ”she warns.
For Maude-Émilie St-Pierre, regardless of the relational model that everyone identifies with, there are great lessons in the documentary series. “Consent, respect, perception of love, needs, etc. Polyamorous people are the champions of communication, which is the basis of any relationship,” she notes. Its co-writer insists that polyamory is no better than monogamy, and explains that the polyamorous relationship can develop in an ethical way, with as many challenges as pretty stories. With this philosophy as a common thread, Polyamory opens the way and outlines the field of possibilities. “A lot of people, of all ages, in a lot of different situations and configurations live this model,” concludes Christophe Magnette.