You question me with your gaze, hoping for an almost definitive answer when everything is so moving. I’ve drawn bastard conclusions about the catch-all of existence and try to replace naivety with a more serene alternative to bitterness, resignation or anger. A kind of painful lucidity sometimes arises, as in this beautiful phrase by the poet René Char: “lucidity is the wound closest to the sun”. Between two jives and two laughs, I am incandescent.
It’s age that does that: layers of complexity, perspective, consciousness are added, like a new lens to the telescope. You realize that the complete universe lives in you, that it is not enough to brandish the word “soul” to be profound. Power knows what to do with the violence it provokes in you, but it is powerless in the face of humor (John Lennon). Practice your mental karate.
Your favorite color changes over the years. I like white more and more, a shade rather than a color. The peace of white calms me.
I have no advice to offer you; perhaps all you need is to preserve your strength, to know where to get your feet back. The spa is too expensive, the stories of your friends are sighs of envy, have you looked at the sky today? “Life, love, money, friends and roses / You never know the noise or the color of things” (Gabin). You have never read Virginie Despentes; we need feminist suicide bombers like her.
“Centuries of women before us managed things with dignity. And I say that they ate their shame and put smiles on their insomnia, “she wrote in Dear asshole.
However, when we are young, we have less confidence in intuition because we do not have the knowledge
I know one thing: like the people of Zelensky, you will have to prepare for combat. Nothing is gained, neither the right to dispose of your body, nor your freedom, nor equity, nor your security, nor your peace of mind. RIP the zen, RIP the princess and the queen of banknotes. Amazon does not deliver vacuum-packed freedom.
From now on, I have become the mentor, the big sister, the neighbor, I adopt you one by one to change the world drop by drop. You each carry your stigmata and your disappointments as women. You are from zeitgeist, Telus or Fido, the phone brandished as a chipped mirror. Siri, Siri, tell me who is the most beautiful? Siri offers you to turn off the light and listen to podcasts with her (him?) in the dark when you ask her how to save the planet. Seneca, that old philosopher, would tell you that we suffer more from our imagination than from reality. Perhaps we suffer from our lack of imagination too. Intermission.
Take your time
I know, everything is going too fast, but take the time to listen to you, your little voice, your instinct, everything is there for the decisions. Leaf blowers make too much noise, I know, they’re loud phalluses. On the sidelines of Instagram advertising, ambient rumor, unnecessary noise on TikTok, under your lack, under social pressure and seductive lyrics, a very small voice. You have to turn everything off to hear it.
There is no prince charming (RIP him too) and true love is very rare, never as you expected. You can buy lotto tickets, but you won’t know why we love you anymore. A generous guy is sexy, an honest guy is even better.
My little voice said “you’re a dick” when he spoke. I didn’t understand that stubborn little voice; such a “good guy”, a saviour. Finally, the little voice triumphed: too perfect to be honest, I told you, Jo! He attacked my friends behind my back. Especially the oldest, she knew less how to defend herself. Dear asshole.
You can sometimes think you’re crazy because you hear those voices that can’t lie to you.
I want you to read To our daughters, a series of interviews with Quebec designers. You will probably not know any of them, but they are all worth the detour. They’re a dozen great voices to add to your Amazon arsenal. Nicole Brossard, Paule Baillargeon, Marion Wagschal.
Chosen and interviewed by the writer Michèle Plomer, they had to fight to get to the bottom of their doubts, to exist, to die standing. They are old enough to dare to be frank on many subjects, including sex and female desire.
The late writer Marie-Claire Blais talks about the difficult question of having children: “Let’s say that the choice to have children or not is no longer made without a certain anguish. […] Births will continue, but women will be more and more worried, it’s saddening. I am that worried mother. Saddened.
Reinvent the paths to fulfillment. There is not just one lane, but avoid the freeway. There are too many people on the 20, it’s smooth and predictable as a shower girl with pink balloons.
The little girl of today will work very hard tomorrow with men, with all of humanity, to save the world. She’s here for that.
In balance
I have always sought balance between the poles of love, family, son, work, friendships, health, creation, son, inner life, loneliness, discoveries, son. I have reached the age of transmission, without aspiring to it. I realized that, without a sisterhood, we wouldn’t get anywhere, even though we were conditioned to compete for the favors of Prince Void.
“I consider that we are still in the process of building female power together. There is nothing finished. In a life, there is nothing that ends; it’s a chain that continues, “says Jeanne Lemire, 73, head of the Paulines bookstore, member of the religious community of the Daughters of Saint-Paul, one of the 12 women ofTo our daughters.
At the end of the winding road, the one we knit, there are your sisters and all those who will encourage you to exist through other eyes, other destinies. They are waiting for you. Don’t miss the sign.