My column from last Monday on the Pride Parade discomfiture1 got me all kinds of comments. On Facebook, a young woman didn’t like me saying that the new team had spent a lot of time defending a myriad of demands when it would have been better to take care of the logistics of the event.
Posted at 7:15 a.m.
This woman, as anonymous as an abandoned orange cone on Robert-Bourrassa Boulevard, called me an “old favored straight white boomer.”
I don’t mind a crumb being called boomer. Neither favored white man. But being called straight, I don’t take that!
I’m kidding, but this comment made me think about how some people react to ideas they don’t like. They find nothing better to do than throw an insult or two, often the same ones, without any effort of originality.
I notice that the term boomer has been back in fashion for some time. Besides, you don’t find it strange that the most ardent defenders of human rights, racial, social, sex or gender equality are often quick to call “old croûtons”, “old mononcles” or ” old boomers” who they pick on?
They advocate respect in all its forms by doing… ageism. The worst part is that they don’t even realize it.
In short, I find us lazy in our way of insulting. It lacks work, depth and culture.
You write “cretin” or “asshole” and you imagine that the work is done. But let’s see, to insult well, you have to apply yourself, you have to think.
This week, I went back to my library to re-read a booklet that has been lying around on a shelf for many years: The art of insult. This delightful little book was compiled from many of Arthur Schopenhauer’s writings.
This great German philosopher, who died in 1860, gave a lot of thought to the question. He tells us that the proper slur or the insult that is meant to hit requires preparation. To achieve its purpose, insult must be learned and practiced.
The one who mastered the art of mockery and invective believes that you must first choose the interlocutors with whom you want to talk. But this is the tragedy of our time. Social networks put before us strangers, invisible faces, ephemeral beings.
From there this laziness and all these “osti de moron”, “big bitch”, “big cave”, “crisse d’épais” which abound.
By the way, why do we insult? The magazine Philosophy looked into this a few years ago. According to Aristotle, insulting does good and relieves. The desire to insult is often preceded by anger. By swinging one cowrie to another, we ease the tension.
Closer to home, William B. Irvine published a book in 2013 entitled A Slap in the Face: Why Insults Hurt – And Why They Shouldn’t. According to the American philosopher, the insult makes it possible to keep one’s place “within a group”. Interesting, isn’t it?
I think we can apply that to small groups that form on social networks. The insulters try to impose themselves by multiplying the insults. They don’t have to go very far to find a master: Donald Trump is a pathetic role model.
To insult is to want to be right. And this gesture is often the last resort. However, it is not with primary invectives that one shines. An insult must contain an idea. It is the richness of the formula that puts K.-O. the opponent.
When Winston Churchill said of Clement Attlee, who won the first general election after the Second World War against him: “He is a modest man who has every reason to be”, the formula is both cruel and hilarious.
Our insults lack wit, but also lack of humor.
Far be it from me to encourage insults. We live in a world violent enough as it is. Moreover, Schopenhauer reminds us that we always have the choice to ignore the insults and to act as if nothing had happened.
“Even in the face of the grossest insults and invectives, the wise men did not let their reserve be lost and they maintained their serenity,” he writes.
The impact of verbal or written insults should not be underestimated. A study from the University of Utrecht2in the Netherlands, looked at the effects of insults on mental health.
This study, published on July 18 in the journal Frontiers in Communication, shows that the impact of an insult is similar to that of a “mini slap”. Repeated insults create anxiety and self-esteem issues.
Should we return an insult or suffer it? That is the question. It all depends on our level of wisdom or our degree of inebriation. How many times will it have to be repeated? At the third glass of wine, we leave the social networks and we have an episode of MASH or of Me and the other.
For my part, I try to follow the path of humor and kind arrogance.
This is the “nose tirade” method. When Cyrano de Bergerac is insulted by the Vicomte de Valvert about his appendix, what does he do? He tells her that her attack is weak and clumsy. He even encourages her to put more effort into it.
Valvert: “You… you have a nose… er… a nose… very big. »
Cyrano: “Ah! Nope ! This is a bit short, young man ! And Cyrano to provide him with a thousand fabulous examples to insult him.
Destroying an insult with a lesson in the art of insulting is the best weapon there is.
In short, the next one who dares to call me straight has better watch out!