The little sores | To end the panic in front of these runny noses

Parenting a toddler comes with its own set of challenges. And it happens that we no longer know where to turn to find answers to these little everyday worries. Once a month, The Press explores an issue that affects the well-being of preschool children with the help of a specialist. Today: how to manage your anxiety in the face of the appearance of symptoms in toddlers?

Laila Maalouf
The Press

The fall is approaching. And the fall that follows will inevitably bring its share of runny noses, nasty coughs and nights plagued by fever. COVID-19 has certainly made parents much more anxious about the presence of symptoms that were, until recent years, almost commonplace in young children.

Many parents even wonder if they have become “paranoid” about the health of their little ones. How to get through next fall without giving in to panic when the children fall ill?

Psychologist Nathalie Parent, who is also a lecturer and author of numerous children’s books, immediately reassures parents. It is normal to feel anxiety in the face of this unprecedented situation to which we have been exposed for two and a half years. “It’s related to all the adjustments that entails, all that it asks young families to do as an adaptation” in the face of a positive test result, she says.

In some people, it can become a real “symptom phobia”, specifies the psychologist. “We can develop manias, obsessive compulsive disorders (OCD) such as the obsession with washing hands or wearing a mask. But with good reason, for some, given their experience, their health – and their mental health too. When you’re exhausted because you have young children who get up at night, when your sleep isn’t as good, there really is a context that can favor the development of an obsession or an almost panic-like anxiety. »

That said, when symptoms appear, she insists on the importance of quickly cutting through disaster scenarios. “To come back here, now,” explains Nathalie Parent.

It can be very useful, moreover, to go back to those difficult times that we managed to overcome in the past, “when our ability to adapt was excellent”, she notes, in order to have self-confidence and manage to face the coming autumn.

And the children in all this?

An anxious parent who is unaware of their restlessness may unwittingly dump it on their child. And the child can himself develop in return an anxiety disorder, disturbing or disruptive behavior, raises the psychologist.

“The parent has a power of action; the first is to learn to manage himself. And if it’s difficult, there are tools, there are professionals who can support it,” emphasizes Nathalie Parent.

Once the anxiety is under control, it is in the parent’s best interest to discuss it with the child, in his opinion. “It’s important to talk about it without the emotion, the panic fear. To say, for example: “I was worried, it’s true that it scares me, but we know that we have abilities, we will face this, we will face this together.” The watchword is “together”. We are not alone in this. »

“Because that’s a bit like the role of parents,” says Nathalie Parent. Help our children to live what they have to live in their emotions, in their experience, in their life experience, and give them confidence in the face of life. »