Our idols | Our parents’ heroes

There are idols that we inherit.

My mother listened to Richard Desjardins a lot. His music rocked my youth and has never left me since. Obviously, the way I look at the man and his work has changed. Gone are the days when I was convinced that he knew me, since he sang about a “beautiful Rose-Aimée”. As I got older, I not only understood that I was not the only one to bear this first name (although…), I seized the poetry, the flights and the voice of Desjardins.

Yet her music still smells of the cleansers my mother used to do housework and her notes still give me the soft effect of maternal false nails caressing my scalp.

I therefore take advantage of the file that Press presents this Sunday About Idols in an attempt to understand the role these beloved heroes play from generation to generation.

What was our mother hoping for, giving us the gift of her love for Richard Desjardins or someone else?

A transmission of values

“When I talk about sport with my father, we are talking about us,” spontaneously launches Samuel Archibald, author, professor at UQAM and specialist in popular culture. He has given a lot of thought to the function of idols, which retain certain characteristics of the heroes of ancient Greece, according to him.

“I think that sports idols play the role of exemplifying a behavior or a virtue,” he explains to me.

“Because beyond their exploits, we choose our heroes for their flaws. They humanize us and refer us to our own capacity to improve ourselves, even to correct our mistakes through certain successes. ”

Samuel Archibald gives me the example of Mickey Mantle, star baseball player who dealt with alcoholism: “I was not even born when he stopped playing! It is oral history… It has legendary status in my family, my grandfather talked about it to my father and it all came back to me one day. My father was also fond of Guy Lafleur – who smoked a cigarette between the first and second half! When he told me about him, he was kind of like, “I know I’m not perfect, but always count on me to score a goal, if I have to.” ”

Our parents’ heroes hide pretty unspoken things.

A cultural heritage

“I inherited a lot from my mother’s musical tastes,” Jean-Sébastien Girard confides to me. I liked the music she listened to. She was touching me. And I still find it heartwarming! ”

The host of JS Tenderness (HERE Première), columnist (The evening is still young) and author (Quebec 80) is a notorious nostalgic. I immediately thought of him when I started to think about family idols.

And he is far from being the only one to always let himself be moved by his mother’s idols. “When we receive special requests, for JS Tenderness, half of people want to hear a song that was playing in the family car. The soundtrack of childhood is an interesting marker in our life. ”

Indeed, an emotional bond unites us to the heroes of our parents. But it is also present not only within a family, but also in society, according to Jean-Sébastien Girard. “Karaoke is the biggest demonstration of this! At midnight, everyone sings the same BB or Ginette Reno song, without the slightest snobbery. We sing in unison, among pure strangers. The songs that made us vibrate are an extraordinary bond… ”

Reassess his idols

A question bothers me. If a parent tries to transmit specific values ​​to us by exposing us to his idols and the exploits of these idols weave our culture, can we then afford? to turn your back on them? To refuse this legacy because it is not in accordance with our tastes, even our values?

Samuel Archibald thought for a moment before answering me. “I think critical thinking requires us to re-evaluate our childhood idols. Without giving up, I questioned several, precisely because of the values ​​with which they were associated. In traditional masculinity, I believe that certain faults are highly valued. We tend to sell the idea that to be a great hero, you have to be excessive in everything! Can you be a good basketball player without having a terrible character? ”

On the opposite side of the spectrum, if we sometimes have to take a fresh look at the Michael Jordans of our childhood, we can also embrace the idol of a reverse parent. For example, the young Jean-Sébastien Girard was not particularly fond of Charles Aznavour. However, the host understands today why Yesterday again is an immense work: “It’s a song that we appreciate in the middle of life. I finally understand my mother’s obsession with her… ”

Sometimes bridges are created late, but they are no less important.

Indoctrination?

So, what are the idols that Samuel Archibald now wishes to bequeath to his children?

The author tells me about the rapper Notorious BIG and fictional figures as singular as they are strong. Ripley and Sarah Connor, respectively from the films Alien and Terminator, for example: “It’s super important for me to pass badassness on to my kids, so I want them to meet the original badass heroine. If that can be that, the role of a woman in a film, it can be in life too! ”

It makes me think: don’t we sometimes kiss our parents’ idols because we know that they dream of being like them?

Basically, are we just looking for parental love?

Samuel Archibald agrees that it is possible, while assuring me that children often see clearly in this game. To avoid indoctrination, this is where critical thinking comes in. It’s up to us to disentangle what we want to keep or not from these heroes.

Which brings me back to Richard Desjardins …

Come to think of it, everything is good with him. As Brassens sings, “there’s nothing to throw away”.

So thank you, Mom, for the spotless idol. It only remains for me to find out if his hymns would also be unifying in a karaoke, now!

One thing is certain, even the most seedy of song bars would momentarily smell of the soap you used to wash the floor of the house …